Saturday, June 8, 2013

A look back...

On this date eleven years ago, I was walking down the aisle to marry the man who I thought I would spend the rest of my life with.  It was a beautifully, simple celebration and we were surrounded by loving family and friends.  We were young, a little (ok, maybe a lot) naive and ready to start our lives together as husband and wife. 

Fast forward to a little over a year ago.  A little more than a month before ten years would be celebrated.  The man who I thought I would be with forever dropped a bomb on me.  Apparently, he had been unhappy for quite a while and was not "in love" with me anymore (among many other issues he proceeded to list).  I'm honestly not sure how long my state of shock lasted.  I remember that night clearly, but the days that followed were a blur.  I was emotionally more fragile than I have ever been and it was a scary place to be. As the numbness wore off, I think I felt every emotion one could possible feel.

Anger. Disappointment. Failure. Bitterness. Sadness. Disbelief. Frustration. Shock. Miserable. Unhappy. Weakness. Fear.

When I finally processed the situation,  I offered possible solutions...anything to save what was suddenly falling apart before my eyes.  Every solution was shot down.  His mind was made up and I had to accept that.

The year that has followed that bomb has placed me on paths I never imagined I would take. Some of those paths have been painful to walk down, but the majority of them have led me into the space of some amazing people and places.  I am constantly reminded of the incredible family and friends I have.  Their support and love have helped carry me to my current situation.   And what is my current situation you might ask....

Happy. Amazing. Free. Adventurous. Relief. In Love. Joyful. Content. Brave. Strong.




3 comments:

  1. I am so sorry you had to go through all the hurt and pain at all, but without it you wouldn't be where you are. Trite? Yes. But, I mean every word. You are an amazing woman Christina and I am proud to call you friend. Much love for a fantastic future...one that is totally deserved. Hugs!

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  2. xoxo - It is never a fun journey, but in the end you are in a MUCH better place. Most importantly, you are happy. :)

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  3. As we all know, in order to get to the place we're supposed to be, sometimes there are hurdles we have to jump to get there! I am just so thrilled that you came over those hurdles and have found yourself a happy place!

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